Iran talks collapse as president watches New Zealand man knock out Czech man in under four minutes
Trump Was Watching a U.F.C. Fight in Miami While Iran Talks Collapsed
On his way to Florida, President Trump said it did not matter to him if a deal with Iran was reached or not: “We win, regardless,” he said.
On Saturday evening, as Vice President JD Vance took a podium in Pakistan and said no deal had been reached to end the war in Iran, President Trump was in Miami watching a mixed martial arts fight.
Mr. Trump spent several hours orbited by Secretary of State Marco Rubio; a few of his children; some Ultimate Fighting Championship officials; Sergio Gor, the U.S. ambassador to India; the recording artist Vanilla Ice; Dan Bongino, the former deputy director of the F.B.I.; and the manosphere shepherd Joe Rogan.
April 11, 2026 New York. Times
The Rutabaga
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WORD COUNT 642. READING TIME2 min 34 sec
By Staff Reporter · The Rutabaga · Miami Bureau · April 12, 2026
MIAMI — Describing the evening as “one of the most instructive of my presidency,” President Trump confirmed Saturday that he had drawn multiple actionable foreign policy conclusions from watching Carlos Ulberg knock out Jiří Procházka at 3:45 of the first round to claim the UFC light heavyweight title, a fight Trump said contained “frankly, more useful information about Iran than anything the State Department has ever given me.”
“Procházka — great fighter, by the way, tremendous chin — he hurt his knee in the first minute,” Trump told reporters while still wearing a lanyard reading GUEST – DANA WHITE, which aides had asked him to remove three times. “And then what happened? He kept coming forward. He kept pressing. And he got knocked out cold on the canvas. That’s Iran. That’s exactly Iran. I don’t need to be in the room to understand that.”
“We win, regardless,” the President said on the way to Florida, a statement his advisors confirmed applied equally to the nuclear negotiations and to a side bet he had placed on Ulberg at plus-money.
Sources inside the administration confirmed that the President had been presented with a two-page diplomatic briefing on the Iran talks as Air Force One descended into Miami, and had responded by asking if anyone knew what the over/under was on the Ulberg fight. Officials familiar with the matter said the question was technically answered — 1.5 rounds — and that Trump had used this information “more than he used the briefing.”
The collapse of negotiations, which multiple regional experts described as a significant setback with potentially severe consequences for Middle Eastern stability, was confirmed to the President between the Cub Swanson walkoff knockout on the main card and the Paulo Costa fight, a window his national security team described as “not ideal but honestly better than nothing.” Trump reportedly received the news, nodded, said “beautiful,” and then clarified that he was talking about the Swanson finish.
ALSO IN TODAY’S RUTABAGA
Ulberg unaware his victory has been incorporated into U.S. foreign policy
Iran also watching closely, notes injured man who kept pressing got knocked out
Procházka says knee injury ‘nothing personal,’ clarifies he was not commenting on nuclear situation
Dana White declines to be named Secretary of State, leaves door open
When asked by reporters whether the failure of nuclear talks represented a crisis, Trump disputed the premise, noting that Jiří Procházka — “a former champion, very strong, very respected” — had also appeared to be losing before the end, and that the situation in the Middle East was “basically the same thing except I’m not the one with the bad knee.” He declined to specify who had the bad knee.
At press time, the President had returned to his Mar-a-Lago residence and posted a 2 a.m. Truth Social message calling Carlos Ulberg “the greatest light heavyweight of all time, possibly ever,” before following it with a second post reading “IRAN KNOWS,” with no further context provided. Administration officials confirmed both posts had been intended and were “part of a strategy.”
In a brief follow-up statement issued Sunday morning, Trump walked back his earlier praise of Procházka, telling reporters that upon reflection he did not actually have respect for the former champion. “He has a bad knee. I don’t like people with bad knees. I’ve always said that. A bad knee is a loser’s knee. Ulberg didn’t have a bad knee — that’s why he won. That’s leadership.” The President then paused and added that this applied to Iran as well, though he did not elaborate on which party he believed had the bad knee, and no follow-up questions were permitted.
FTS
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